KANSAS CITY, MO -- Clyde Barley has just been informed that his mother’s house will be closing after being in operation for his entire life. The decision was made after a series of scathing reviews began appearing on Yelp. “This is a lot for me to take in right now,” Clyde told Sauce On the Side, “I always thought the food there was great.” Mr. Barley’s misheld belief that his mother’s cooking was fantastic more than likely stems from the fact that he had to endure it for so long as a child. The food itself is almost entirely inedible.
One of the reviews hailed his mother’s macaroni and cheese as: “A steaming pile of garbage that inexplicably got worse with every bite.” Mr. Maxwell’s girlfriend refuses to visit his mother at her home due to previous health-related incidents. His mother’s house has been visited by health inspectors on numerous occasions, but each time she manages to avoid inspection largely because she “doesn’t run a restaurant.” Clyde’s mom has been planning on closing for some time now, and it seems that the deluge of negative reviews has made the decision for her. When reached for comment, Clyde Maxwell’s mother had this to say: “You sound nice. Clyde’s a nice boy too. I just hope he figures out somewhere to go for family holidays from now on.”
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