BOSTON, MA -- Cody Bronson has been working at Reservoir Hogs for the past month. He’s adjusting to most things at his new job with ease; the menu isn’t overly complicated, the calls aren’t confusing to him, and he can keep up in a rush just fine. But Cody just can’t seem to keep up with the rapid-fire trash talking that permeates throughout the kitchen.

“Seriously, those guys are leaps and bounds ahead of me in that department,” Mr. Bronson told Sauce On the Side, “I’ve worked in plenty of kitchens before. I know my way around smack talking. I thought I was pretty good, but working with this crew is like taking a master’s course.”

Several days ago, Cody was told by his coworkers that: “You’re not working class. You don’t work and you sure as shit don’t have any class.” Rather than defending himself in any way, Mr. Bronson dropped the entree he was about to put in the window. This unretorted insult was hanging like a dark cloud over Cody for the next few shifts.

It wasn’t until his day off yesterday, when he was in the shower, that he realized what he should’ve said all along. It hadn’t even occurred to Cody that no one remembered the incident that had been plaguing him for days when he burst into the kitchen and shouted into the kitchen: “Being a dick won’t make yours any bigger.” No one is entirely certain why he did that, but they are grateful for being given more ammunition to mock him the next time he clocks in.
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