Sean Russell, Author at Sauce On the Side

Prep List Simply Suicide Note

COLORADO SPRINGS, CO -- Dave Grohl, prep cook for Steaks, We Serve Steaks; an area oyster bar, has finally had enough. The night staff and several dishwashers have been testing the limits of his sanity over the past few months,…

Sean RussellApril 26, 2018

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Dad Not Impressed By Flaming Drink

ORLANDO, FL -- Dale Kershaw is a devoted husband, loving father of three, and completely apathetic to the events transpiring at his daughter’s twenty-first birthday. Lacy, his oldest, was told she could mark the occasion at whatever restaurant she wanted,…

Sean RussellApril 25, 2018

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Prison Sommelier Thinks D Block Has Great Wines This Season

JACKSON, MI -- Carson Bravewell is currently serving 25 years with the possibility of parole for a series of armed robberies. In addition to being excellent at creating improvised stabbing utensils, Carson also possesses a refined palate. He spent the…

Sean RussellApril 20, 2018

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CPS Involved After Take Your Child To Work Day

SCOTTSDALE, AZ -- Davos The House: A Place For Pancakes, a local restaurant, has recently been the subject of great controversy. The diner has become the target of a Child Protective Services investigation after implementing take your child to work…

Sean RussellApril 7, 2018

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Child’s Birthday Party Derailed By Drunk Cooks At 4PM

JACKSONVILLE, FL -- Bobby Jansen is celebrating his 8th birthday at Arcade Fryer, his favorite pizza parlor. He enjoys racecars, space, and playing with action figures. There’s three things that really bug him in this world: his sister going into…

Sean RussellMarch 17, 2018

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Sous Chef Disgusted With Own Coke Habit

BIRMINGHAM, AL -- Henry Davidson, sous chef for Here Comes Truffle, feels as though he’s reached a low point in his life. After, unbeknownst to him, his coworkers replaced the majority of his cocaine with baking powder, Mr. Davidson has…

Sean RussellMarch 13, 2018

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Girlfriend Doesn’t Get Cook’s ‘Sharp Behind’ Joke During Sex

MODESTO, CA -- Karen Iverson has been dating Oscar Gordon for three years. Oscar is a line cook at Cal Zone, an area italian eatery, and has been since the two met. Karen, who works in accounting, has never once…

Sean RussellMarch 2, 2018

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Frustrated Dad At Restaurant Just Wants A Normal Burger

SANTA FE, NM -- David Metzer, an area patriarch and veteran in spousal arguments, has reached his level of tolerance in meat-based tomfoolery. The ground beef luddite had managed to throw his arms up in disgust and chuck the menu…

Sean RussellFebruary 28, 2018

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Customer Wonders Mid Bite Why They Call It Ranch

ATLANTA, GA -- Full of Crepe, an area diner, is currently the site of a landmark epiphany. Conrad Doyle, a regular at the establishment and a bit of an idiot, has been holding is fork in front of his mouth…

Sean RussellFebruary 24, 2018

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Restaurant Detail Cleans With Sprinkler System

LAWRENCE, KS -- The staff of a local diner has been congratulating themselves over their latest and greatest idea. The employees were told that they would be closing for the day in order to detail clean the restaurant top to…

Sean RussellFebruary 21, 2018

Sean Russell

Prep List Simply Suicide Note

Dad Not Impressed By Flaming Drink

Prison Sommelier Thinks D Block Has Great Wines This Season

CPS Involved After Take Your Child To Work Day

Child’s Birthday Party Derailed By Drunk Cooks At 4PM

Sous Chef Disgusted With Own Coke Habit

Girlfriend Doesn’t Get Cook’s ‘Sharp Behind’ Joke During Sex

Frustrated Dad At Restaurant Just Wants A Normal Burger

Customer Wonders Mid Bite Why They Call It Ranch

Restaurant Detail Cleans With Sprinkler System

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