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Hedge Fund VP Worries Verbal Tip Wasn’t Heard

JACKSONVILLE, FL -- Brent Gionni, longtime Jacksonville resident, contacted our industry insiders early yesterday morning on his morning commute. Mr. Gionni, 32, wanted us to know about a recent experience that has been weighing heavily on him. On Wednesday, Brent,…

New GuyFebruary 9, 2018

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Instagram Restaurant Only Serves Menu

SEATTLE, WA -- The Instagram restaurant, AirBites, has created quite a stir amongst the millennial crowd through serving their menu. Just their menu, nothing more. If you have to ask them why, you obviously can remember the nineties. Those with…

New GuyFebruary 8, 2018

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Inmate’s Last Meal Sent Back

LEAVENWORTH, KS -- David Bradley Cooper, local resident of the maximum security federal prison, has been given only a matter of hours to live before death by lethal injection. David Cooper, known to his friends as ‘DB,’ will be going…

Greg ParkerFebruary 7, 2018

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Confused Chef Tries to Get Foie Gras Out of Park Ducks

LAREDO, TX -- The kitchen staff of Stealy Dan’s Fine Dining Roadhouse, has been uncertain of how to approach their head chef about his latest special idea. Kevin, the chef in question, decided that an excellent way to cut down…

Sean RussellFebruary 5, 2018

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Delivery Driver Mistaken For Actor On Porn Set

LOS ANGELES, CA -- Kevin’s Bacon Pizza and Wings, a local restaurant, has been hemorrhaging delivery drivers over the past few weeks, and none of the managers are entirely sure why. “We’ve had guys on payroll here for months who…

Doug KliewerFebruary 4, 2018

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Latino Waiter Impressed With Dad’s Pronunciation

BATON ROUGE, LA -- Pedro Infante, a server at The Guero Grita, is gobsmacked at the patrons of table 36 in his section. The family’s patriarch has been flaunting his aptitude for language all night, and it’s astoundingly not super…

Sasha JordanFebruary 3, 2018

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Restaurant Makes Own Salt Out Of Employee Tears

NASHVILLE, TN -- The Pita Abyss, an area restaurant, has taken steps recently in revamping their menu in order to give their guests a greater fine dining experience. After several culinary experiments, the owners of The Pita Abyss have rolled…

Eric MadsenFebruary 2, 2018

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Failing Restaurant Shuts Down, Reopens After 15 Seconds

BUFFALO, NY -- Tom Derekson, owner and proprietor of It’s Just Fucking Pizza: a Pub Place, has fallen on hard times with his company. After opening the doors of his restaurant to hordes of nobody, several months ago, Tom’s been…

Greg ParkerFebruary 1, 2018

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Easy Bake Oven Strains Siblings Relationship When Lemonade Stand Expands

WICHITA, KS -- Sarah and David Smith, 6 and 8 years old respectively, opened a successful corner lemonade stand 5 days ago with seed money from their parents and a few neighborhood friends. Their return on investment has been substantial…

Sean RussellJanuary 31, 2018

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Ex-Convict Has Suspiciously Good Knife Skills

MILWAUKEE, WI -- The staff of Urban Troutfitters, an area seafood restaurant, has found itself in the midst of a debate as to what to do with their newest employee. Dale Delaney, a recent hire at Urban Troutfitters and an…

Eric MadsenJanuary 30, 2018

Uncategorized

Hedge Fund VP Worries Verbal Tip Wasn’t Heard

Instagram Restaurant Only Serves Menu

Inmate’s Last Meal Sent Back

Confused Chef Tries to Get Foie Gras Out of Park Ducks

Delivery Driver Mistaken For Actor On Porn Set

Latino Waiter Impressed With Dad’s Pronunciation

Restaurant Makes Own Salt Out Of Employee Tears

Failing Restaurant Shuts Down, Reopens After 15 Seconds

Easy Bake Oven Strains Siblings Relationship When Lemonade Stand Expands

Ex-Convict Has Suspiciously Good Knife Skills

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