BIRMINGHAM, AL — Tyler Lawrence is on his last nerve with his parents. Every single weekend he works his ass off, while his parents send him text messages like: “Want to get lunch with us?”, “Could you make it to church this Sunday?” or “Let us know if you have any time this Friday.” They never seem to realize that he’s busy doing his job while they just kind of sit at home, or whatever it is people do on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. “It’s just sad to see them not doing anything with their lives,” Tyler said. “I just don’t think they realize that some of us have this little thing called a job that requires us to work 65 hours a week from Thursday to Monday. I mean, it’s cute that they think they’ve got it all figured out with a ‘salary,’ ‘vacation time’ and whatever the fuck ‘healthcare’ is, but I don’t buy it. “But I can’t really buy anything to begin with. I work hard for this money, and it doesn’t go far. Unlike my parents, who just order shit off Amazon willy nilly. I can’t wait until they realize the value of a dollar; you know, that thing that’s the difference between a pack of decent cigarettes or that McChicken you need so that you can say you ate something today. “They’re gonna wake up some day and think to themselves: ‘Oh my god, I wasted my life seeing foreign places and relaxing when I should have been yelling at a hostess about cleaning off sticky menus and then getting off and drinking the pain away until tomorrow when you have to do it all over again.’ That’s what it’s like for those of us who live in the real world.”

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