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DENVER, CO — The front of house crew at Pho Patrol has been frantically searching for a way to soothe the aching burn that the kitchen has just unleashed upon them. “It was devastating,” Karl Klamper told Sauce On the Side, “One of our other servers was bringing dirty plates back to the disher. I guess she said something about the plates that he took the wrong way and then the disher served the server a dish diss so severely scalding the staff didn’t dare direct dissent towards the disher’s destructive derision.”

 

The kitchen has been praising Mogly, their dishwasher, for a solid thirty minutes after “really sticking it to that waitress.” He has already gotten a 25 cent raise from the kitchen manager, who was lucky enough to have been present to witness the disparagement. The burn was so epic, that the original target of the insult has been hospitalized with burn covering 95% of her body.

 

Due to the total sickness of the burn, everyone else within earshot has taken severe collateral damage. Unfortunately for the staff, Pho Patrol is a Mexican restaurant and their supply of mustard is incredibly limited. As a result, first responders have been sent to the McDonald’s across the street in order to grab as many packets of mustard as they can.

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