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LOUISBURG, KS — Ken Bourban’s: Vietnam, a recent addition to the small town of Louisburg, has been opened to mixed reviews. This has come as a major shock to the owner, Ken Bourbon, who thought that everyone around would be flocking to try his melancholic delicacies. “I honestly thought this town needed something like this,” Ken told Sauce OTS, “a place where people could come together and see how great a role American influence has played on Vietnamese cuisine. I guess I was wrong. Nobody’s ready for honest, poignant flavor around here.” The restaurant itself has no menu whatsoever. Instead, Mr. Bourbon has elected to parse out the meals in twelve, increasingly disturbing courses.

The locals have given mixed reviews of the establishment. Some claim that Ken is creating thought-provoking masterpieces every day. Others believe him to be a sham, glossing over the facts that truly made Vietnamese cuisine what it is today. “Here’s my problem,” Sasha, the area Yelper and smug polluter, said, “Ken is just trying to manufacture the history and culture of Vietnam in a way that suits him. In my opinion, that man hasn’t the faintest idea what pho is supposed to be. I would know, I went to Vietnam in the nineties.”

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